It’s one of the most popular questions I get. Men ask me, “what does it feel like to have sex with a transgender woman?”
They ask this, of course, because my girlfriend is a non-op transgender woman. And I have frequent sex with her.
For many men, their attraction to transgender women is often thwarted by their misunderstanding of how sex works. This leads to fear and apprehension – and that’s entirely fair.
So let’s break down the ins and outs of having sex with a non-op transgender woman – all based on my experiences.
What’s It Like To Have Sex With a Transgender Woman?
First, it is vital to understand my situation on a personal level.
When I first began dating Selma (that’s what I’ll call her for the sake of this article), I didn’t know she was transgender. Her body is petite, curvy, and soft. Her face is intensely feminine. Her bubbly personality and higher-voice chords certainly indicated girl.
And in the same light, she was apprehensive of me and how I’d feel about the situation. But clearly, she couldn’t wait too, too long to disclose the big news.
She takes hormones that help with some of the aforementioned feminine physical traits, but as stated earlier, she’s never had any operation. Translation: Selma has a penis.
When Selma first told me of her penis, I admittedly was shocked. But I also found myself incredibly curious. I wanted to see her penis, but I didn’t want to ask her that. And I was unsure if I was OK with my penis curiosity.
So one night, when we were making out, I pulled it out and played with it. Immediately, I found that it turned me on in an exotic type way. Being her body and face are ultra-feminine, it never felt as if I was with a guy, per se. And moreover, it was clear that I was able to turn her on and pleasure her with the simplest of touch strokes. That was fantastic and empowering.
My Transgender Girl’s Penis Is Small
Her penis isn’t huge. I don’t know that I can call a penis “feminine,” but if I could, that’s how I’d describe Selma’s.
It’s a cute penis to me and fun to play with.
Selma gets hardons fast and easy. But even if she’s hard in a public space, you can’t see any bulge.
My Transgender Sex Experience
There are a few ways we have sex. Sometimes, we give mutual handjobs. Other times, I give her a blowjob (and vice versa). And then the grand finale, the big daddy of them all, is anal sex.
Anal sex provides the most normalcy or traditional sex experience as it often results in my being on top. Anal sex is anal sex, whether it is between cisgenders or cisgender and trans. I can get on top of her missionary so long as she tucks her penis. I can also, quite clearly, go in from behind.
We both love a variety of positions and sexual play.
One thing that being with a transgender person has taught me is that communication is not only imperative to great sex, but part of the fun. Because Selma and I are sort of forced to learn our sexual landscape, we are constantly communicating about sex. So we truly know one another on a highly intimate level. If more cisgenders emphasized acknowledging each other’s sexual landscape, their sex lives would vastly improve.
So now for the big unveil – does transgender sex feel like gay sex? The answers is a hard no. My girlfriend is highly feminine. When I touch her, I’m caressing a woman. I’m turned on by a woman. The penis aspect adds flair to the intimacy, but it doesn’t make me think I’m with a man. Although, I am straight, I’m attracted to women.
Transgender sex is it’s own unique experience. That said, it’s super fun if (and only if) you find yourself attracted to the transgender girl in the first place (as a girl). That’s the primary prerequisite.